Philip Laing, 19, of Macclesfield, Cheshire is a criminal. What was his crime? On the 11th October 2009, he urinated over Sheffield City’s war memorial.
Now before you recoil in sheer horror at the heinousness of this act, just consider the appalling waste of time, money and effort that went into bringing this prosecution.
The case came to light after a photograph of Laing appeared on the Daily Mail website.
Thereafter Britain’s biggest manhunt since Frank Mitchell - the Mad Axeman was sprung from Dartmoor Prison by the Kray twins - was now in full flow… Okay, I admit it, I’m exaggerating. But what I’m not exaggerating is the sheer nonsense of bringing a case like this – with all the costs and agencies involved – to court. It’s patently absurd and disproportionate.
Unbelievable though it may seem, the presiding district judge, Anthony Browne, actually considered bestowing a custodial sentence. What stopped him? “I have never seen anyone more contrite for what has happened nor one who regrets more the hurt and distress he has caused.”
Thank God he showed contrition otherwise Laing actually have gone down for this piece of stupidity. The judge continued in a similar hyperbolic vein: "You have understandably had the wrath and indignation of the public heaped upon you and your family."
His family? What have they got to do with this? He’s 19! The man peed on a war memorial. He is not the Yorkshire Ripper or Fred West. If this is the sort of language you reserve for peeing on a war memorial, what on earth would you use for something really serious?
Laing, a sports science student at Sheffield Hallam University, had drunk a bottle of whisky, and more, during an evening binge that included attendance at a private event being staged by the ironically titled, Carnage UK.
You can describe his behavior as distasteful and idiotic. But what of the people who brought the prosecution? The accused is just foolish and apart from having little regard for what he was doing, is not exactly public enemy No.1. In the end he was fined £185 and is required to do 250 hours community service in recompense.
Whose idea was it to waste police and judiciary resources on bringing this prosecution? Laing should have been fined (by post), had his picture published in the newspaper and been charged for a copy of Alistair Horne’s, “The Price of Glory: Verdun 1916”, then he might have some inkling – in his sober moments at least - why people stand in the street at war memorials and keep two minutes silence on the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month.
You can’t choose your place in time and space, which is probably just as well for Laing, because were he to have been born in 1897 rather than 1990 – he would probably be listed on a memorial just like the one he urinated on rather than a university roll.
Walking along Victoria Road on Glasgow’s South Side, I noticed two police officers booking a cyclist. Her crime, which will no doubt involve a court appearance, seemed to be cycling on the pavement.
What do you think? I’d throw the book at her and knock off her bicycle before taking the case to court and recommending that she serve no less than a life tariff for this. Cheeky bitch!
Ed Hart is a finalist in stv.tv's The Write Factor competition. The views expressed are not necessarily those of STV plc. If you would like to read more from this writer, use our comment system below.
Last updated: 30 November 2009, 09:59
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